Title: The Bare Truth in BeXar County Finished 1/12/03 Author: FatCat (feedback to FatCat926@msn.com) Website: Please visit the wonderful page Donnilee has created to house my stories at her site, http://donnilee.tripod.com. Just follow my name to find my stories. While you are there, take a peek at the other wonderful stories Donnilee has at her site. Thank you Donni! Rating: R, Loving sexual conduct Category: X(sorta) AU, MSR, RST, MA, SA, HEA (Ask if you can't figure it out) Spoilers: No Requiem, season 8 or season 9 in this world, but you will find bits and pieces of many of the Season 1-7 everywhere. Archive: As you wish, but please keep my name attached and let me know where to visit. Summary: What really kick-started their relationship? Disclaimer: They aren't mine nor anyone's but CC, Fox, 1013, DD, and GA's. These works are used without permission-no infringement intended. Author's Notes: A big THANK YOU to Frohike-Beta Extraordinaire. Without your honesty and talent, I wouldn't enjoy this nearly as much! XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX BeXar County, Texas April 18, 2000 6:00 PM XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX "Agent Scully! Telephone! Line eight," a voice called from across the crowded room. Two heads swiveled almost in unison toward the disembodied voice, then back toward each other. "Thanks! I'll get it in the Chief's office," Scully said as she broke eye contact with her partner and turned to acknowledge the receptionist. She walked into Chief Steele's private office and shut the door. The celebration that swirled around the bullpen continued. Uniformed police, ATF Officers, Texas Rangers, and FBI Agents mingled unabashedly relieved and happy with the outcome of today's mission. The disarmament of The Green and The Grey stronghold had been successfully completed without a shot fired, a knife thrown, or an explosion set off. The first nine days of the confrontation had pointed toward a total meltdown. The teams of negotiators from all the agencies involved had made no headway. The FBI team, including Fox Mulder and Dana Scully had arrived only the day before. Contrary to all the dire scenarios projected, the estimates of personnel loss, and the bad press expected, the final day of the ten-day standoff had played out quietly. At the center of the celebration was a surprised and happy Special Agent Fox Mulder. Though he was the man of the hour to all the jubilant officers, Mulder's entire being was focused on the door Dana Scully had just closed. He knew what the call was about. The only reason anyone would use this number to call Scully was to deliver news about the results of the blood work she had done three days ago. The blood work that would tell her if the final in vitro process was successful. This was their very last chance with Scully's ova. Mulder was concentrating so deeply on the door he didn't realize he had began to pray to a God he professed not to believe in. "Please GodpleaseGodpleaseGodpleaseGodpleaseGod..." repeated over and over and in his mind-a picture of a baby in the arms of his partner completing the plea. The door to the office slowly opened and Scully stepped out. As soon as Mulder saw her face, he knew. The test had come back negative. There was no UberScully-Mulder in their future. Mulder's thoughts moved to will Scully to look at him, to share the pain with him and not withdraw from him. So deep was his concentration he did not realized that Sergeant Julie Mills was talking to him. She had been talking to him for several minutes, and because of his mumbling was not aware of his inattention to her invitation. Frustrated with his seemingly coy game and murmured responses, she stepped closer, brushing her breasts against his chest and arm and moving her hips into contact with his as she ran her arm up his to hook her hand behind his neck, bringing his head, if not his eyes, toward her face. "Agent Mulder, did you hear me?" she said slightly louder. "Yeah. Sure. Fine. Thanks," he said as he watched Scully finally raise her eyes and look across the room at him. For a moment the sharing he had sought flowed between them and the fear of her withdrawal was eased. She pushed through the crowd toward him but stopped as the path suddenly cleared between them. Scully's eyes widened and then closed as if in pain. When she opened them again, her thoughts were completely closed to Mulder and he was confused. Her glance swept down his body and back to his eyes, an expression of raw pain flashing across her face. She turned and strode from the room, ignoring all the celebrants still smiling and patting her on the back. Mulder finally looked down into the shining brown eyes of Sergeant Julie Mills. She was pressed against him and was speaking to him. "Great! I'll pick you up from the motel at 8:45. Things don't usually get going at these parties until then. Don't forget to wear jeans-no suits allowed here in San Antonio. You're in God's country." She gave him a flirty smile and walked away. Mulder realized something important had just happened, but all he wanted to do was to go after Scully. He moved to follow her, but was slowed by various Agents and Officers offering their congratulations as he went. "All right Mulder! This is your lucky day! First you single-handedly figure out how to end the standoff and then Sergeant Julie Mills, the hottest Officer in the Texas Rangers, asks YOU for a date tonight to the celebration." "You lucky dog, or should I say Fox!" "Man, some guys got all the good looking women after them!" On and on they ribbed him, slowing his progress toward the door. Unused to praise and approval of his peers as he was, he didn't know how to tactfully fend them off. He wanted to pull out his gun and shoot his way clear to Scully, but knew that wouldn't please Skinner. As far as his AD and the FBI were concerned their bad boy had finally done something right and he didn't want to upset Scully and change their opinion. At last, he pushed through the door and rushed down the short hall to the outside. The celebration had spread to the parking lot and he had to hesitate at the top of the stairs to look for a flash of bright red. He spotted her when one of the half dozen or more men surrounding her moved. She was accepting a plastic cup of something from an oversized Texas Ranger standing too damn close to her. She made a comment he couldn't hear but saw the immediate interest in the Ranger's face as he joined in the laughter her joke triggered throughout the group. He approached her with a feeling of dread. He knew Scully. This smiling, seductive woman flirting brazenly with all the men she could attract was not his Scully. This was Scully masking her pain. This was Scully mad as a hornet. This was bad news for Mulder. Scully saw Mulder hesitate at the top of the stairs. She reached to accept the plastic cup from the tall, good-looking Texas Ranger, standing in her personal space and said with a smile, "If there's iced tea in here, this could be love, Officer?" "Trey Sanders, Miss Scully." He grinned back and said, almost on cue, "This must be fate. Do you like it with lemon?" "Yes" was all she said, but the warmth of her gaze encouraged the big man to reach for her arm and guide her away from the other men. Throwing them a glare when they started to groan and tease, he then transferred his gaze back to Scully. "The Chief is giving a BBQ tonight to celebrate the end of the case. I would be highly honored to escort you. Maybe we can find something in common more than our mutual love of iced tea." He grinned at her with the most amazing smile. His full lips reminded her of Mulder's. This thought brought back the pain she had felt moments ago. She started to decline his invitation. The news she had received today followed immediately by Mulder's betrayal filled her mind and she needed to have some time alone to come to terms with both pieces of pain. As she opened her mouth to decline, she saw a movement in her left peripheral vision and felt Mulder's fingers brush her elbow. She moved her arm from Mulder's touch by raising her hand to tease the Ranger's tie as she leaned closer and smiled up at him. "I'd love to go the Chief's BBQ with you, Trey. Please call me Dana. What time should I expect you? You do know where I'm staying, don't you?" She felt Mulder stiffen and step closer again. She cut off any statement he could make by turning to him and saying, "Ah, Mulder, there you are. I need the keys to the car. I want to go back to the motel now. I'm sure someone else will run you out when you're ready to leave." She held out her hand until he automatically handed her the keys to the car. Turning back to Trey she smiled and said, "Until tonight?" "I'm looking forward to it Dana. I'll pick you up around 9:00," he grinned. Scully was not a woman who used her femininity as a weapon or a tool. She was comfortable with her body and knew her efforts to keep it strong and healthy resulted in an alluring appearance as well. She played down this allure in order to make her way in a male-dominated world. She was the consummate professional. It was usually reflected in her selection of fashionable but severe business clothing, her body language, and of course, her demeanor. As she walked away she knew all the men behind her were watching. She decided to give them something to remember. Scully strutted away. The sway of her hips and the hair flip she executed perfectly as she flashed them a grin over her shoulder made every heterosexual male in the group drool and the one that wasn't, reconsider his options. Trey Sanders was feeling lucky. He wanted that little redhead from the moment he laid eyes on her . . . all thoughts of Julie Mills had disappeared. At first he was sure he didn't have a chance. His initial impression was that Agents Dana Scully and Fox Mulder were more than partners. After watching them work together, he assumed that they were married and she kept her maiden name for professional reasons. As events played out, he realized that they were partners, probably best friends, but professional enough to stop short of personal involvement. His hopes of seducing Dana Scully had soared until Mulder had pulled that trick that had saved the day. Trey shook his head and grinned as he contemplated his evening. He watched her until the car was out of sight. Then turned and bumped into an angry Mulder...a very angry Mulder who was glaring directly at him. Trey lifted his chin defiantly and glared back as he stepped around him to leave. 'Hell, Mulder can't have all the beautiful women, even if they all want him after his display this afternoon,' Trey Sanders thought. XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX BeXar County, TX April 18, 2000 10:27 AM XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX Agents Scully and Mulder's participation in the FBI Negotiation Team had been an after thought. SAC Anderson had made it perfectly clear from the beginning that he had not asked for nor wanted them included in the team. Mulder's obvious expertise in abductee mentality and their high solve rate meant precious little compared to the reputation of Spooky and the Mrs. as far as he was concerned. Luckily, AD Skinner's opinion was different. They were just what the team needed. The press was having a field day with the entire standoff. The members of The Green and The Grey Cult were individuals that claimed they had been previously abducted by aliens. They had purchased a good-sized piece of the Texas countryside outside San Antonio in 1998 and had been quiet, if strange, neighbors until recently. Two weeks ago they barricaded themselves on the ranch. The first indication of trouble was the absence of the children noted by their teachers. When school officials questioned various members about the lengthy absences of the children, the paranoia and suspicion that had fueled their actions, escalated to dangerous proportions. Nine days ago, all contact with the leaders of the group had ceased. They had barricaded themselves in their compound, claiming to be armed to the teeth, and reports had been unsubstantiated but consistent that they had a small nuclear devise. They claimed the aliens were coming to take them and not one of the 42 souls was willing to be abducted again. They were so sure that they wouldn't allow another abduction that they had all signed a suicide pact upon joining the group. What had started as a truant officer visit, quickly escalated to include law enforcement officials from every conceivable agency. The negotiation teams from all the other branches had failed and all efforts to communicate had ceased by the time the FBI team arrived. SAC Kenneth Anderson had immediately pushed his way to the forefront and taken over the headquarters. This had not endeared him to the other negotiators who had been on the job for several long days already. At first Mulder and Scully were just two more agents milling around the perimeter, quietly talking to a number of the other agents and officers and civilians along the line. Scully's eyes had sparkled as she watched Mulder ask his questions and ruminate the answers as they stayed in the background. She was waiting for him to make the connection in that brilliant mind of his that would save the day. At least this time he didn't have to slip into the mind of a criminally insane monster. She had no doubt that he was up to the challenge. She could hardly contain herself. Fortunately, she didn't have to wait long. They were in a brainstorming session called by the leader of the Texas Rangers. Time was slipping away and everyone was desperate to find an answer. She was looking at him the moment the solution came to him. His eyes had snapped to hers. She inclined her head and raised her left brow. His eyes had narrowed and a blush had actually spread across his cheeks. She knew this was going to be good. He motioned for her to follow him and he quietly excused himself and left the group. She followed after a discrete moment or two. He was pacing at the end of the hall, his head down. One hand was tugging at his bottom lip (God, did he know how sexy that was?) and his other rubbing his neck. She was becoming increasingly nervous about this, but could not stop the smile that quivered on her lips. "Okay, Mulder. What have you come up with?" Mulder's small smile reappeared, as did the blush on his cheeks. "Scully, hear me out before you say anything. What is the common denominator with all these people? The Cult members, the local citizens, all the law enforcement people have one thing in common. Do you know what it is?" "Well, the obvious answer is power." Scully said after a moment. "Good answer, Scully. Good, but not the lowest common denominator." Mulder smiled and rushed on, "Fear! Fear and suspicion!" She watched him, knowing he would continue when he was ready. "I don't think these people want to die. From what I've heard, they've found a good home here and have been satisfied until recently. From all reports, they seem to love their children and are hard workers. They have never displayed this type of erratic behavior until now. So I asked myself what the trigger could be. It all comes back to fear and suspicion." Mulder looked directly into her eyes. "I started asking around and found out one of the newest members of the group has been sowing seeds of fear and suspicion in order to wrest control, or power if you will, from the old leader. It would never have come to this if he hadn't pushed too hard and ignited the fear of reabduction in a number of the more volatile members." "And now they're backed up into a corner and have nowhere to go." Scully finished. "Right!" Mulder beamed at her. "I suppose you learned all this from the officers here?" she smiled. "A little," he grinned. "But most of the information I needed came from the locals, especially the two little old ladies in the lawn chairs on the back of the pickup truck over by the highway. Miss Clair and Miss Emma. They are the pillars of the local Daughters of Sam Houston and more than willing to let me know exactly what was what about everything and everyone that they had ever met." Scully smiled, remembering the two elderly ladies delight at Mulder's interest in their opinions. "All the law enforcement officers here are also reduced to the lowest common denominator...fear," he continued. "What do you mean, Mulder? Why are they afraid?" Scully wanted to hear his complete reasoning before agreeing. "Come on Scully, you know everyone from every agency here is scared. They're afraid of the loss of life and the bad press that's being generated... especially after Waco and the Branch Davidians. But they're particularly fearful of the threat of a nuclear blast." "All right let's say I agree. Everyone is afraid and suspicious. What's your solution?" Scully was impatient to hear his final conclusion. "Wait, there's more. According to Miss Emma's description, the latest member of the cult is the spitting image of the new number one on the FBI's Most Wanted list... Eric Neeks. Does that name ring a bell with you, Scully?" he was grinning now. "Eric Neeks, the three time loser that is hiding from the mob, several drug lords, and has top billing with the FBI for killing two agents? That Eric Neeks, Mulder?" she returned his grin. "Yep, that's the one." "Cool!" she couldn't help using the Gunmen's favorite phrase. "We have to get in there Scully. I have every confidence that Neeks is a desperate man and will have no problem inciting these people to set off the devise as a cover for his escape." "I agree, Mulder. Just what do you have in mind?" "How did you know I have a plan, Scully?" "You always think of a plan, Mulder," she said with quiet pride in him. The blush was back and again she wasn't sure she was going to like what she was about to hear. "I do have a plan, Scully, but..." "Just spit it out, Mulder." "Well, I think I know how a single negotiator would be allowed in to talk with the group." "This better be good, Mulder, you're blushing again." "When I was talking to the original negotiators they said that the old leader of the cult had offered to let one person in to talk to them. At first everyone thought this was the break they were looking for, but when they gave the conditions for the individual's approach, it was dropped and the offer to talk was rescinded." "What were the conditions, Mulder?" she asked quietly. "The agent had to walk up the drive alone, with no weapons or communication devises on their person." "How would they know if the negotiator didn't have weapons or communication devises hidden on them, Mulder?" "Umm... because, ah, Scully, that person had to be naked." "Mulder! You're not thinking of offering to expose yourself to the danger of those crazy people and, and..." Scully couldn't finish her thought aloud, but 'And in front of all these other women' ran through her mind. "Yes, actually Scully, I am." He straightened and seemed to grow taller as he grew used to the idea of assuming responsibility. "I know what to say to them to get them to reconsider their offer." "I can't wait for this, Mulder! What could possibly prompt them to ask for you?" "The truth, Scully, just the truth." "Which is what?" "That my sister was abducted by aliens and I have spent my life trying to expose the presence of aliens in our country. And I have one piece of information that they cannot resist." Mulder grinned and waggled his eyebrows. "What is that, Mulder?" "I know how to recognize an alien bounty hunter and I can teach them how to exterminate them." "Mulder, you know that if there were a bounty hunter in that flock of loonies, your life wouldn't be worth a plugged nickel! What are you going to do? Have each of them prick their fingers and see who bleeds green? I can't let you do this Mulder," Scully was scared. "Maybe you're right, Scully, but I find it amazing that the Bounty Hunters all look like our Mr. Neeks," he hesitated as he let her digest this. "Scully, you know I have to do this. There's a lot on the line here. It's not just the cult members, but every living soul within thousands of miles that will be affected by even a minute nuclear explosion. And if that's not bad enough, think about the repercussions around the world." "Mulder," she groaned. "No." "Come on Scully, what's wrong? I know I'll sound irrational and look foolish, but if I can stop this I have to try." "No, Mulder, you can't do it. You could be killed!" "What's really wrong Scully? Afraid all the ladies will take one look at me and try to steal me away?" he gave her a teasing grin while waggling his eyebrows at her. "More likely, the other agencies will have their psych Docs take you away!" she tried to tease back to hide the blush that crept up her cheeks now. Just her luck. She was finally on the verge of a personal relationship with Mulder, and he was going to go public with all his best parts before she got her private viewing! "Seriously, Mulder, I don't want you to walk in there with Neeks holding a gun. What's to keep him from killing you outright?" "I've thought of that already. I'll talk to the old leader, Mr. Isaac, when I negotiate the meeting and hint to him that Neeks could be a plant by the aliens. I can do this Scully. I have to try. Will you back me?" "You want me to strip down and go in with you?" she said only half way believing she was teasing. "Scully! I'd never ask you to do that! I...you're...I need your calm voice of reason to help convince the others that this will work. We'll talk about the mutual nakedness when I get back," he softly teased her. He opened his arms to her in supplication and after a moment she walked into his embrace. "You know I'll help, Mulder. But you need to come back safely. I want an active partner in our new project, not a dead hero," she said with tears rimming her eyes, unable to speak aloud of the life possibly growing in her. "Scully!" He hugged her to him for a moment. He wanted to say so much, but needed to wait until they were off duty and actions could speak as loudly as words. "Let's get this over with," she sighed. "Oh, Mulder," she said with an sly grin, "Don't forget the sun block...everywhere!" Once again he blushed. Mulder's proposition was met with disbelief and derision, at first. He quietly continued to describe his plan, with Scully's help, stressing the psychological impact of giving the cult leaders information they couldn't pass up. Eventually the others agreed that, short of storming the compound, it was their only viable course of action. Within minutes of this decision, the plan was put into action. Contact was made and Mulder was given permission to approach the compound. Three teams of sharpshooters were deployed to cover him as best as possible up the lane to gate. All the locals and the press were removed from the area. If one of their own was going to go in buck naked at least he wouldn't have to worry about showing up on national television! The surprising factor in all this was the eagerness of Mr. Isaacs to allow Agent Mulder entrance to the compound. Mulder's conjecture that this was a power play by Neeks was dead on the truth. XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX BeXar County, Texas April 18, 2000 5:50 PM XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX Five hours after Mulder and Scully had presented the solution to the others, Mulder had successfully defused the situation. He had walked up the dirt lane to the ranch as naked as the day he was born, convinced the cult members that Neeks was the enemy, and quickly arrested him. He had then proceeded to successfully calm the fears of the members and persuaded them to surrender. When the balance of the officers were allowed entry to the compound they found that the Cult members were not hiding a nuclear weapon but a rather large greenhouse full of pot plants in various stages of growth. Twenty arrests were made for charges as varied as encouraging truancy in a minor to possession of illegal weapons, drugs and drug paraphernalia, and failure to license firearms. The most newsworthy item of the day was the capture of Mr. Eric Neeks. Mulder was the hero of the day. Scully was proud of her partner. He deserved the praise from his peers. His refusal to speak directly to the press had garnered the admiration of many of the fellow officers that originally thought he was trying to gain notoriety with his actions. She was glad to see him recognized for his brilliant mind and his courage. She wasn't so sure she was as happy with all the increased attention of the female members of the teams. More than a few eyebrows had been raised as Mulder strode up the lane to the compound, his beautiful body exposed to all eyes, wearing only a pair of shower thongs on his feet. She had been given more than one envious and accessing glance. She met each look with a cool stare and soon felt in control again. Only a few of the other female officers had the nerve to approach her directly. Sergeant Julie Mills had shown the most interest. Scully was feeling decidedly uneasy until Mulder had returned from the compound, decently covered, and had eyes only for her. All was right in her world again. Let him swim in the praise for a while. God knows he deserved it. It was his ID of Neeks and his brilliant mind that put all the pieces together for the solution. Scully felt it was about time his fellow agents had more than his Spooky reputation to talk about. This would probably garner a nice commendation on his record and she was thankful he could enjoy it and not have to say thanks from a hospital bed. She slipped into the restroom from the bullpen to once again call her answering machine and check for any messages from the doctor's office. Today was the day the test results would be done. She was fixing her hair when Julie Mills stepped into the small women's bathroom and locked the door behind her. "Agent Scully, I was looking for you." "Really?" Scully had some idea what this woman wanted and was in no mood to play nice. "Why yes! I just wanted to ask if your partner, Fox, is involved seriously with someone back home?" "Someone back home? No, there's no one waiting for him in DC," Scully said circumventing the true meaning of her question. 'Fox's one and only happens to be standing right here talking to you, if I have anything to say about it.' she thought with a wicked inward grin that left no mark on her serene face. "Why, then, I'm sure glad to hear that. I thought I would expire when I saw that glorious hunk of man walking down the lane to the ranch. How do you manage to keep you mind on work with him around?" Julie Mills was a woman on a mission. "You must have ice water in your veins or a great looking man of your own to manage all these years with that hunk as a partner! Are you married, Agent Scully?" she questioned as she checked her makeup. Scully shook her head, unwilling to give this woman any more information than necessary. Julie wanted Fox Mulder and she was going to make sure she took out all the obstacles before she made her move. She would show that big lug Trey Sanders to ignore her. "I mean, everyone knows that partners are forbidden to date. I can't understand what they were thinking putting you two together. It's very unusual for a male/female partnership here in Texas. Why the only time that happens is if one of the partners is married or gay or..." "He's not gay, is he?" Julie asked with a calculating expression. Scully could barely keep her face placid. Fox Mulder, gay? Of all the rumors and innuendo that had been spread about him, this was not new, but as far off the mark as possible. Mulder had turned his share of male heads since Scully had known him, but she knew he never looked back. "No, he's not gay," was all she said. As Julie assimilated this good news, a sudden look of mixed horror and embarrassment flushed over her face. Her eyes widened. She began to blush and stammer. "I mean, there's nothing wrong with a person being gay. I didn't mean to imply that there's anything wrong with making an umm, alternative life choices for a man or a woman. I... I forgot I needed to check the fax machine for some faxes I was expecting faxed to me." With that she turned and tried to yank the door open, forgetting she had locked it. She fumbled with the lock as she flashed Scully a faint smile and rushed from the room as quickly as possible. Scully stepped to the door, relocked it, and started to smile. The smile turned into a laugh and then into one of biggest fits of giggling she had ever had. She couldn't get over how comical the tall, leggy Miss Julie Mills, ex-beauty pageant winner and Texas belle looked when she thought she had locked herself in the bathroom with an angry lesbian. 'Mulder will love this one,' she thought. She left the bathroom to search for her partner. She wanted to run to the mall down the street to pick up an outfit for the party Chief Steele was throwing tonight. She hadn't packed anything festive for this potentially grim mission and tonight, she felt like wearing something other than a black suit. It took a few minutes to locate Mulder. He was in the bullpen surrounded by a group of rowdy law enforcement officials. She watched as his normally taciturn and quiet persona warmed to the camaraderie and he began to enjoy himself. As if he felt her eyes on him, he began to search the room for her. When their eyes met, his small smile bloomed into a full Mulder-grin. Dana's knees actually felt weak at that moment. She began to weave through the crowd toward him. "Agent Scully! Telephone! Line eight," a voice called from across the crowded room. Their heads swiveled almost in unison toward the disembodied voice, then back toward each other. "Thanks! I'll get it in the Chief's office," Scully said as she turned to smile at the receptionist. She walked into Chief Steele's private office and shut the door. Moments later, her world fell apart. XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX Motel Lone Star BeXar County, TX April 18, 2000 7:30 PM XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX Scully pulled into the parking lot of the motel and turned off the car. She glanced at the pile of bags next to her and began to chew on her bottom lip. She was upset with herself. She had received what could possibly be the worst news of her life today. She had no more chances to carry her own child. The final in vitro had failed. She was officially barren. All she wanted to do when she had hung up the phone was to find Mulder and sink into his loving support and return to the motel room so she could sob her heart out. She, they, would not have a child. All the examinations, the shots, the nausea the hormones induced, the raging sexual desire that had been a surprising side effect... all these had been worth it when the thoughts of a baby in her arms had been at the end of the process. Now, she was officially childless, without a hope of joining the gene pool of earth. She suddenly felt as bankrupt emotionally as she was financially. The in vitro procedure had been turned down as an allowable expense by their medical insurance. She had decided to shoulder the expense and continue with the procedure. Mulder had offered to pay for the procedures and let her pay him back. She had gently refused his financial help, feeling her request for his participation in a more personal manner was beyond a friend's obligation to a friend. She had drained her savings to finance the procedures, but it was all over now. So what had she done as soon as she could escape the crowd and Mulder? She had gone on a shopping spree! Purchasing casual clothing-sexy casual clothing that she would probably never have use for again. The fact that she couldn't really afford to splurge on clothing right now didn't bother her as much as trying to figure out why she had done it. She honestly hadn't thought about her motivation until now. As she slowly gathered her purchases and walked into her motel room, she searched her heart for the real reason she had gone a little...crazy. She was devastated by the news about the test. Had she been home, she would have probably holed up in her apartment and eaten her way through several different kinds of Godiva Ice Cream. While shopping she had first picked out a simple dress that she could wear to church after she got back to DC. But as she passed by the racks and shelves of beautiful summer clothes something had changed her mind. Revenge! She realized she was furious with Mulder for allowing Miss Julie, ex-beauty queen and belle of Texas, Mills to drape herself all over him in front of her and everyone else! The only reason she had accepted Trey's invitation was that she had felt betrayed by Mulder. It would serve him right to see her looking like a woman for a change. A happy, beautiful woman! She might even fall in love. She hung up the clothing she had purchased and stared at it trying to decide what to wear tonight. When she couldn't focus on her purchases she realized she was crying. Who was she trying to fool? She was already in love. Even Padgett had recognized the fact that she loved Mulder. She had been in love with him for years, but had never acted on her feelings. She always thought they would end up together, that it was an unspoken agreement between them. He had ended that today. She sank down on the bed and thought about everything that had happened earlier. The phone call had been painful but not unexpected. She had sought out his gaze as soon as she opened the door. All she wanted was to reach her private haven, Mulder. He was still in the exact same spot he had been earlier, when she left Chief Steele's office. He was staring at her with such loving intensity that she knew together they could survive this news. She started toward him but had stopped when the agents between them moved and she had gotten an eyeful of Miss Julie's 'invitation'. The sight of Mulder with that woman pressed to his body had hurt more than she thought possible. She had looked back up to his eyes to let him know what she thought of his behavior and then turned and fled. She could still feel his intense pain boring into her eyes and then her back as she walked away. Wait! What was that thought? He had never taken his eyes from her face. He had been concentrating on her with all his legendary intensity, willing her to come to him, to share her pain with him. It wasn't inconceivable that he was unaware of Julie Mills. Now that she thought about it, Ms. Mills seemed to be trying to garner a response from him by pulling his head down. But his eyes had never left hers. Oh, no! What had she done? Mulder probably didn't even know Julie was talking to him! Her tears stopped as quickly as they began, but the sound of sobbing didn't abate. She quietly stepped into the bathroom and the sound intensified. She froze, listening to the combined sounds coming through the paper-thin wall that connected her bathroom to Mulder's. He was in the shower; she could hear the water running. The other sound that was clear was that of a man sobbing as if his heart would break. "Damn! Mulder, what have I done to you?" She thought about her little flirtation with Trey and the other men in the parking lot and suddenly felt sick. She had no justification for her actions except that she was devastated and angry. She had not stopped to think how the news that the in vitro had failed affected him as well as her. At first Mulder had been surprised by her request for his participation in the procedure. He had agreed shyly, not really believing she wanted him to father her child. But he had done everything he could to make it as painless and un-embarrassing as possible. He had gently teased her when the tension had been almost unbearable. He had been comforting when the news had been bad. He had even supported her physically and held her hair back when the shots had made her so nauseous she had the dry heaves at work, braving the ladies room at the FBI to take care of her. Why hadn't she seen it before? He wanted this baby, too! He wasn't interested in Julie Mills. He was her partner and as their history had proven repeatedly, his loyalty shouldn't be questioned. Dana quickly splashed water over her face and ran her fingers through her hair. Resolve set in her heart, she moved quickly to the connecting door to Mulder's room. She walked into the bathroom and stood silently as she listened to his sobbing. "Mulder?" she whispered. He was sitting on the floor of the tub with the water sluicing over him, tears flowing, nose running, unashamedly grieving. Visions of another motel bathroom and Mulder's trembling body in the shower flooded her mind. "Mulder?" she spoke slightly louder. When he didn't respond, she stepped to the curtain and reaching through, shut off the water. The dripping of the faucet and his shuttering breath were the only sounds in the room. She moved back and picked up a towel from the rack. She shoved the curtain out of the way and held the towel up to cover him as he stood up with his back to her. "Scully, what are you doing here?" he said with a child-like hitch in his voice. "I thought you had a date." "Mulder, we both have a date, unfortunately they are both with the wrong people." She began to dry his back and arms. She moved quickly and efficiently down his body, past the beautiful, broad shoulders, the narrow waist, the tight runner's butt and on down his legs. "Scully, I can do this for myself," Mulder threw over his shoulder. He was not about to turn around and let her see the beginnings of the erection her touch created. "Mulder, I know you can take care of yourself, but please let me do this." Scully said with downcast eyes, "Please?" She dropped the wet towel and reached for another one. She gently rubbed his hair and stopped. "Turn around Mulder," she quietly ordered. When he didn't make a move, she leaned closer to him and whispered, "Please let me do this Mulder. I need to touch you." He slowly turned and allowed her to dry his front. Her eyes followed her hands down his body, hesitating only when they reached his erection. With a blush flushing her cheeks and her best professional manner, she completed her task. She lovingly dried every inch of his skin and discarded the wet towel. She sighed deeply and stood in front of him for a moment, uncertain. She slowly raised her right hand to him, palm up. He automatically placed his left hand in hers and moved out of the tub and she led him into the main room. She moved to the bed and indicated that he was to sit. As she rifled through his bag for a pair of boxers, her blush darkened. He was surprised when she handed him the shorts and quickly turned and reentered the bathroom. He heard her searching his shaving kit and wondered what she was looking for as he donned his boxers. She returned with his aftershave and brush. She gently pushed him back down to sit on the bed and quietly moved between his legs to brush his hair. She smoothed aftershave on his face and then held her hands to cup it, searching his eyes. "Can you forgive me?" she quietly asked after a long moment gazing into his eyes. "Scully!" he breathed. He reached out and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her close enough to bury his face between her breasts. "You didn't do anything wrong! We tried. We did everything the doctors said we needed to do. If anyone should apologize it's me. I was the one who waited too long to tell you about the ova. I'm sorry, Scully! It's my fault that you won't have a baby. If anyone deserved to be a mother it's you!" He began to shake and she knew he was going to start crying again. He was blaming himself for her sterility! How could he be so brilliant and so dense at the same time? "Mulder! Stop! It's not your fault and it's not my fault that we cannot have a child. We have made decisions in our lives that have influenced this result, but we did nothing wrong! Nothing! Do you hear me? We are not to blame. Blame the Consortium, CGB Spender, the Reteculian invaders, my abductors... any one of the above! But never blame yourself. There is no proof that the procedure would have worked when you first found the ova any better than it did now. Mulder, think about it! The medical profession wouldn't have even known how to proceed until recently." As her words flowed over him he seemed to believe her at last. He nodded and was silent for a long time. He finally raised his eyes to her. They were filled with tears and pain. "I know you think I hesitated at first. I was so overwhelmed that you wanted me to be the baby's father." Mulder looked into her eyes to make sure she understood his feelings. "Damn, Scully. We... It was my baby too, Scully." His misery was written on his face. "I wanted a little girl with red hair and blue eyes. I wanted to take her to the park and show her off at work. I dreamed about her first date, graduation, and career... she would be a doctor like her mother. I had even started to think about her marriage and grandchildren. Scully, I dreamed of grandchildren before I even knew if we would have a child!" "Oh, Mulder," Scully was shocked at the depth and strength of his desire for their child. "I wanted to be a good father to her. I wanted to do all the things a real family would do. You know, all the things that were taken away from me when Sam was abducted. I wanted it all Scully, but the best part of all was that I could have this child, this piece of heaven, with you," he lowered his head to her breast again. "Only with you, Scully." They remained immobile, each lost in their own thoughts and struggling for emotional control. When she felt she had command of her voice again, she began to whisper to him. "I wanted a little boy, with brown hair and hazel, kaleidoscope eyes. I dreamed of basketball and baseball games with his father, watching him as he explored the tidal pools on the Vineyard and teaching him to sail. I wanted more than anything to love him and give him every happy memory I could to prepare him for life. I wanted him to be a man of integrity like his father, like you, Mulder." Tears were flowing down her face again. They melted into each other drawing strength and acceptance from one another. Finally Scully pulled back slightly. "But right now, Mulder, I need your forgiveness for something else. Earlier today, I... ehrm...I make an assumption and I know now I was wrong. You weren't flirting with Julie Mills. I shouldn't have run from her. I should have walked up to her and let her know clearly that you were not available! Not for the BBQ and not for life. Instead of making a fool of myself with Trey Sanders I should have been there for you, in your arms, as I wanted to be." "Scully," he sighed and hugged her tighter. They clung to one another for a long moment. She bent slightly and kissed his hair. She could feel his lips curl into a smile against her belly. "Scully are you coming on to me?" he leaned back to catch her eyes. "Yeah, I think I am, Mulder. What do you have to say about that?" she smiled down at him as she ran her fingers though his hair. "I think it's a shame that we both have dates tonight. We could just hide in the room and not answer the door," he was only partially teasing. "Mulder, as much as I would like to do just that, I think we both need to show up at that BBQ with our respective dates. Unless I'm mistaken, they both are trying to make the other jealous with us. Maybe we can help them along a little," she stepped back a pace and drew him to his feet. They held hands, fingers entwined. Scully searched his face and finally let her eyes rest on his lips. She slid her hand up his arm and stroked the back of his neck then moved her hand to cup his cheek. "Scully, I don't want to..." "I know, Mulder, I know," she smiled into his eyes sadly. "Now go get dressed. I don't want that woman to see you semi-naked up close and personal. She's already ogled you too much earlier today for my liking," she teased him. "Besides, I need to get my shower and get ready too," she said as she moved toward her room. "I'll see you later," she smiled. "Scully, I'll probably be gone when you're done with your shower, so..." "So? Mulder?" she stopped and turned to face him again. He was standing directly behind her and she had to take a step backwards to look into his eyes. So many feelings were warring there. He was so beautiful standing there with the body of a man and the fears of a boy flashing in his eyes. She rose up on her toes and drew him into her arms. She pulled his head down toward her and instead of kissing his forehead as he anticipated, she softly but definitely placed her lips on his. His surprise kept him from participating in the kiss until she began to pull away. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her back with all the love in his heart. They kissed until they were breathless. Mulder was shocked that she had taken this first step. "I love you, Scully," he blurted out. "Mulder, I love you too, but now isn't the time to get into this," she said with a sigh. Surprise flashed across his face. "How long, Scully? How long have you loved me?" He had to know. All the years of loving her and fearing to tell her about his love because he didn't want to lose her, drove him to question her now. She sighed and turned around towards her room. She stopped in the doorway with her head down suddenly shy. "I've known that I felt more than friendship for you for so long I can't pinpoint when it started, but I've known I was 'In Love' with you since Kroner, Kansas." Curiosity was strong in her, "How long have you loved me?" "I would like to be able to say 'You had me at hello', but that isn't exactly the moment," he smiled as his memory of when he fell in love with her played through his mind. "Well?" "Do you remember our first case together?" "When I came into your room and exposed myself to you? Is that when you fell in love with me?" she teased. "It was that case, Scully but not that moment. I was overwhelmed with the trust you gave me that night. But, I fell in love with you while we were standing in the rain in the middle of the graveyard with two open graves and two missing dead persons. When you started to laugh, standing there in the rain, realizing that there was more to this case than you originally thought... that you trusted me enough to be willing to consider that I could be right. How could I help but love you?" Tears filled Scully's eyes. "I'm going to go to my room now Mulder, and I'm warning you if you make me cry after I put my makeup on you're going to be in big trouble!" She slipped through the door and shut it firmly. She stood for a moment with her palm resting on the wood of the closed door. She had the crazy feeling he was standing on the other side in exactly the same position. "Mulder, get dressed," she whispered against the door before turning to get ready to face the evening. "Later, Scully. Later we will finish this." The rough timbre of his voice sent a delicious chill through her body. XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX The Lazy S Ranch BeXar County, TX April 18, 2000 9:30 PM XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX Fox Mulder scanned the entire patio area once again, looking for his partner. He had positioned himself between the food table and the bar thinking he would be sure to see Scully as soon as she arrived. Her date was supposed to pick her up at 9:00 PM, and it was only a twenty-minute drive from the motel to Chief Steele's ranch. Where could they be? Julie Mills was chatting along with almost no input from him. She seemed to be able to maintain a conversation with herself about herself, just fine. God, he was bored and worried. Where was Scully? He finally decided that he must have missed her in the crowd. After all, there were groups of people all over the extensive grounds of the hacienda-style home. He deliberately touched Julie on the arm to get her to stop babbling and said with a small smile, "Why don't we walk around and mix with the other groups here tonight?" "Why yes, Fox! I think that's a wonderful idea! I heard that Chief Steele's godson is going to perform tonight and there will be dancing too." Julie immediately handed her food plate to the next person that walked by and latched onto Mulder's arm moving him to the first group of her friends she spotted. She had the prize and she wanted everyone to know about it. She thought he looked absolutely good enough to eat tonight. He was dressed in a pair of black jeans and a white dress shirt that had the sleeves rolled up to display his strong forearms. The top few buttons were open and she fairly growled when she had first caught sight of his chest. From her earlier observation of his fine self, she knew he worked out. This man was quite the catch. She couldn't wait for the other Rangers to see them together. Surely one of them would tell Trey whom she was with. That would show him! Dana Scully sighed and smiled. If she had to listen to one more over-muscled, testosterone-driven friend of Trey Sanders grunt and nudge him in congratulations again tonight, she would not be accountable for her actions. It was a good thing her gun was locked up in the motel safe. At least Trey was gentleman enough to be embarrassed by his friends' remarks. It was bad enough that he had immediately steered her to this somewhat secluded area of the grounds where only the Texas Rangers were grouped, but he might as well have hog-tied her to his side. His long muscular arm had rarely left her shoulder from the moment they had walked up the path. She was amazed that he was willing to release her long enough to eat the food he had ordered for them. Where was Mulder? It was definitely a handicap being short when men, who all seemed to have to meet a height requirement of six feet or more to join the Rangers, surrounded you. She knew this was probably an exaggeration, but tonight it felt like some kind of weird truth. 'Maybe it was an X File!' she thought with an inward smile. A flash of conversation near her held her interest. This could be her salvation. "Trey?" she said. "Yes, Dana?" he grinned happily back at her. "I think I heard someone talking about Chief Steele's godson performing tonight and dancing somewhere. Why don't we go check it out?" "Do you like to dance, Dana?" he asked. "I would like to listen to the music," she said evasively. The only person she was interested in dancing with tonight was nowhere in sight. They moved toward the side of the house where the first strains of live music was beginning. As they stepped into the light that surrounded the stage, Scully finally spotted her partner. He was walking toward the music from the other side of the house. Julie Mills was clinging to his arm even though it hung limply at his side. She appreciatively let her gaze rake over him. 'You do clean up nicely, Mulder,' she thought. Trey jerked her to a halt. She looked up at him and smiled as she saw the scowl on his face. He was glaring at Mulder and Julie. She saw him shake his head as if clearing it and glance back down toward her. "We're just in time," he smiled at her. His arm tightened even more on her shoulder. She was sure she would be bruised tomorrow. "Have you ever heard of Toby Keith, Dana?" "I can't say that I have, Trey." "Well, the Chief is proud of him. His father and the Chief were best friends when they were in the service together and have stayed close through the years. He's really something in the country music business. He's got some new music ready for release later this year that he's going to perform tonight." Mulder scanned the crowd for Scully. He overlooked her the first time because Trey Sanders and his buddies surrounded her. At last the group parted and he was given a full look at his partner. Mulder suddenly found it hard to breath. Scully. He had never seen her in anything like the outfit she was wearing. It was a simple skirt and tank top, but WOW! On Scully, it was so feminine and sexy. The skirt was soft and flowing and clung to her hips accentuating her tiny waist. She had a sexy little tank top with spaghetti straps at the shoulders and, God help him, no bra. Her only concession to the cooling air of the evening was a beautiful silk stole draped over her arms. She had forgone her usual heels and was wearing soft leather shoes with ties that wrapped up her ankles and drew the eye. Mulder silently groaned and started to frantically think of ways he could escape Julie Mills. That is until he saw the glare Trey Sanders gave him when he saw them together. Maybe Scully was right about these two using them to hurt one another. The lights around the stage dimmed and the spotlights were moved to illuminate the band. A tall, good-looking man with a guitar, a white ten-gallon hat, and a mischievous smile stepped up to the microphone. "Good evening, Ladies and Gentlemen! I'm Toby Keith and I've been asked by my godfather, Chief Steele to entertain you all. I am going to be playing some of my new music later, but now, I want to start with a few songs by some of the best of the business." With that, the music started and a rowdy, upbeat set of songs played to the mood of the crowd. This set of music soon swept into a set of softer music and then back to the upbeat and rowdy. Toby Keith was a master at manipulating his audience's mood. It was during the slower set that Mulder heard a song that nearly broke him. It was 'If tomorrow Never Comes'. He had heard it before by Garth Brooks and realized once again how appropriate it was for him and Scully. He had maneuvered Julie so that they were standing at the left side of the stage almost directly across from Scully and Sanders who stood at the other end of the semi-circle surrounding the band. He and Scully had not broken eye contract throughout the entire song. He knew she felt the truth of the lyrics as well as he did. After a short break Toby came back to sing his new music. The crowd enthusiastically applauded his new songs 'How Do You Like Me Now?' and 'Country Comes To Town.' "You all are the greatest!" Toby Keith shouted. "Lets see some dancing going on. You folks deserve to celebrate!" With that he began to play more of his new music. As the strains of 'New Orleans' began Julie pulled Mulder onto the area where other couples were dancing. With a quick glance at Trey, she molded her body to Mulder's and began dancing. Mulder gently moved her back to a more comfortable dancing position and began to move to the music. Scully smiled up at Trey and nodded toward the dancing couples. "Shall we?" Mulder maneuvered Julie toward the area where Scully and Trey danced. It was hard to ignore the way Trey and Julie kept stealing glances at one another. When the song 'Do I Know You' started, both couples stopped dancing next to each other. Scully looked up at the naked longing in Trey's eyes as he gazed at Julie. She could feel the same look burning into her back from Mulder. "Why don't you ask her to dance, Trey? I know you love her. I can see it in your eyes. Don't waste time on pride. Remember the message in 'If Tomorrow Never Comes'," Scully gently coaxed. Trey looked down at her and gave a smile. "You are some lady, Dana Scully." He moved toward Julie and after a moment's hesitation, she melted into his arms. Scully and Mulder stood listening to the music together for the rest of that song and the next. The words of the song, 'She Only Gets That Way With Me' sank into Julie and Trey's souls and melted their final bits of anger. On stage Toby Keith announced the name of the next song. "Looks like we've been dumped, Agent Mulder," Scully grinned up at him. "Shall we, Agent Scully?" Mulder smiled back. Scully stepped into his arms as the song 'You Shouldn't Kiss Me Like This' began. They danced around the floor and as the words of the music filtered into their brains, they realized that this song could have been written for them. I've got a funny feeling. The moment that your lips touched mine. Something shot right through me. My heart skipped a beat in time. There's a different feel about you tonight. It's got me thinkin' lots of crazy things. I even think I saw a flash of light. It felt like electricity. You shouldn't kiss me like this Unless you mean it like that. Cause I'll just close my eyes And I won't know where I'm at. We'll get lost on this dance floor. Spinnin' around. And around. And around. And around. They're all watchin' us now. They think we're falling in love. They'd never believe we're just friends. When you kiss me like this I think you mean it like that. If you do maybe kiss me again. Everybody swears we make the perfect pair. But dancing is as far as it goes. Girl you've never moved me quite The way you moved me tonight. I just wanted you to know I just wanted you to know You shouldn't kiss me like this Unless you mean it like that. Cause I'll just close my eyes And I won't know where I'm at. We'll get lost on this dance floor. Spinnin' around. And around. And around. And around. They're all watchin' us now. They think we're falling in love. They'd never believe we're just friends. When you kiss me like this. I think you mean it like that. If you do baby kiss me again. Kiss me again. As they danced they instinctively moved closer and closer to each other until there wasn't an atom of space between their bodies. They spun around the dance floor in perfect time to the music. More than a few of their fellow partygoers noticed how they moved together and came to their own, but wrong, conclusion. As much as they felt for each other, today was as close as they had ever been publicly or privately. Not even in Mulder's hallway, before their fateful trip to Antarctica, had they expressed their feelings with such honesty. When the song came to an end, they moved apart. They stood at the edge of the crowd and watched their 'dates' dancing, oblivious to everyone else. The applause of the crowd was deafening for Toby Keith and his band as they moved off the stage. Music from a DJ began immediately. Soon everyone was dancing again and continued having a great time. Mulder and Scully silently agreed to leave and sought out the Chief and his wife. After thanking them for a lovely party and once again accepting his heartfelt thanks for the case resolution, they left. Scully was extremely glad she had insisted on driving Trey to the party instead of allowing him to drive. They would have been stuck without transportation at a time it was imperative that they were alone. They needed to talk before they caught their flight in the morning. Scully handed Mulder the keys to the car. He looked at her questioningly, but accepted. "I want you to drive, Mulder. This car has a bench front seat and if I drive, you won't be very comfortable." He would be crunched up just like Trey had been earlier. The thought made her smile again. He smiled back at her as they walked to the car, opening her door before continuing around to the driver's side. "Thanks, partner," was all he said as they drove toward the motel. They were both reluctant to speak, but a few moments after reaching the main road to their motel, Mulder slid his hand over toward Scully and was pleased to be met half way by hers. They smiled at each other and continued in silence to the motel. Scully allowed Mulder to exit the car and move to open her door for her. She felt surprisingly shy as she stepped aside so that he could shut the door. They hesitated for a moment and then moved to their separate motel room doors. "Scully, we need to..." Mulder did not want to let the feelings from earlier be ignored. "Mulder, give me a minute. I want to talk to you too, but I want to take a quick shower before we talk. I feel like I have been mauled and I know I must smell like smoke from the fire pit." Scully smiled shyly at him, "I'll open the door when I'm decent." "Don't go to any trouble for me!" Mulder teased. Scully grinned at him and disappeared into her room. Fifteen minutes later, she opened the adjoining door and found Mulder leaning against the doorframe, waiting for her. He had obviously had a quick shower and still had had time to get a bucket of ice and a couple cans of ice tea from the lobby vending area. "Hi," he said softly. "Hi," was her reply. "Talking is thirsty work, so I thought you might want something to drink." Mulder's voice was low and exciting. "Thanks. Come on in," she was suddenly feeling shy and unsure of how to proceed. They busied themselves with their drinks and finally ran out of things to do. "Tonight was a great way to top off closing a case wasn't it?" Mulder paced the room. "I mean, we don't have anything in DC to do but go to a bar with the rest of the agents. Texas sure has a better way to get together." He looked at her and grinned sheepishly, "I guess I said that already, though, huh?" "Mulder..." "Scully..." "You first," she quickly said. "No, you first." He was determined to get her to talk. They stared at each other for a long moment. And finally the humor of the situation took over. They both laughed. "Mulder, I'm sorry for jumping to conclusions earlier today. I can only say that I was devastated by this final failure and wasn't thinking clearly," Scully finally started. "Is the doctor sure of the test results?" Mulder held on to a final hope. Scully teared up, "Yes. It's over." "Scully, it's not over yet. There're other things to try. What about a donor egg implanted or a surrogate?" Scully shook her head. "I'm afraid all those are beyond me, Mulder. The final In vitro procedure used the last of my savings because it wasn't covered by our medical insurance. And as accepted as In vitro is, those others are considered experimental and are even more costly." "Scully! I told you I would pay for the procedures-at least let me pay for half the expenses." Mulder was surprised by her revelation. A mulish expression on Scully's face made him change the subject. "What about adoption? There's any number of things we could try," he said. Scully look at him for a long moment, "We? Mulder?" "Yes, Scully. We. That is, if you want me to be part of it," Mulder was uncertain again. "Mulder, I think..." Scully started. Mulder steeled himself for the rejection he feared. Scully heart ached as she reached up to caress his cheek. "I think I need some time before I'll be strong enough to try again. But, yes Mulder, I do want you to be a part of any child I am blessed with. Whether it's our baby or a child we adopt, you are the only one I want by my side." Mulder pulled her to him in a loving hug. "I can accept that Scully. I think we both need some time before we try again." They swayed together, each clinging to their best friend for comfort. "Mulder, would you sleep with me tonight?" Scully's voice was almost a whisper. Mulder drew back to look at her, trying to understand exactly what she was asking. "Scully?" "I'm not sure I'm ready to... I didn't mean we have to... I don't want to be alone tonight. Do you understand how I feel?" Scully was blushing as Mulder studied her carefully. "I do. I know exactly what you mean. I don't want to be alone either." He kissed her softly on the lips and said, "I'll be right back." Scully had finished her nightly bedtime routine and had settled under the covers when she heard Mulder's soft knock. "Come on in. I'm decent." Mulder smiled as he joined her on the bed. "Sleepy, Scully?" he asked as she yawned. "Not really, just tired. Today has been a very eventful day." Scully was suddenly a little shy. Mulder had changed into his pajama pants and a tee shirt. It felt incredibly intimate to be in bed with him. "Yeah, tell me about it." Mulder switched off the last lamp and turned to wrap his arms around her. The room was not dark. There was a light on in the bathroom that glowed through the partially opened door. "Mulder?" Scully whispered against his chest. "Yeah?" he whispered back. "You were magnificent today." Scully stroked his shoulder. "At first all I could think about was how worried I was about you. When you started up the lane to the negotiations I was terrified that you would be killed. I couldn't get the picture of your body riddled with bullets out of my mind, so I tried to think of something else." "I wasn't in that much danger, Scully," Mulder tried to soothe her. "We didn't know that when you started," Scully growled. "So what did you think about to block your fear?" Mulder was curious. "I, uh, kept having flashes of how your skin would feel under my touch, my lips," Scully admitted. Mulder sucked in a deep breath and held it. He was afraid to make a sound that would interrupt her confession. When she didn't continue, he finally breathed out slowly, silently. "Does real life live up to your imagination?" he hazarded. "I don't know, Mulder. You have too many clothes on to compare real life to my imagination," Scully said honestly. "We can remedy that, Scully. But I don't want to rush you into anything. I thought you said you weren't ready..." "Mulder," Scully interrupted. "I don't know if I am or not, but I do want you to take off your tee shirt so that I can touch you. I need to know that you're really here, safe and warm." "For once, Scully, I'm thrilled that you need the evidence in your hands before you'll believe." Mulder smiled as he sat up to remove his shirt. "Care to go for the pants too?" Scully grinned back at him and said in a low, sexy purr, "Not yet, Mulder. Maybe later." Mulder's next teasing remark died, unspoken, as he lowered himself to lie next to her. He watched her face as she let her glance wander over him. The heat generated by her gaze was overwhelming. He swallowed hard and tried to speak, but the pounding of his heart reverberated through his body to his brain and emptied it of all thoughts except one. 'Scully is going to touch me.' Scully knew she was in trouble. She took a careful inventory of her full body response to the sight of Mulder's bare chest and tried to decide what to do next. Agent Scully, Dr. Scully, Scully would give him a hug and tell him how glad she was that he was okay and retreat behind her professional persona once again. Dana Scully, Dana, on the other hand, wanted to touch him, to let her fingers trail over the golden skin of his chest and confirm that he was truly all right. She wanted to let her lips follow her fingers, lingering on the swells and slopes of his well-muscled chest and neck. She wanted to explore the ridges of his abs and the light dusting of hair that defined his pecs. She could enumerate every muscle, bone and cartilage ridge in his chest, but had no interest in doing so. What held her interest, captivated her actually, was the warmth of the living, breathing man in front of her, Mulder, her Mulder. He was alive and oh so healthy. She never allowed herself to touch him unless he was injured or ill. She gave into her every urge. She flicked her fingernails over his small brown nipples and watched them swell slightly. His breathing quickened as she laved her tongue over first one then the other. She knew he was watching her as closely as possible and purposely avoided looking up into his eyes. Her gaze was drawn to the pulsing throb of the vein at the juncture of his neck and shoulder. She let her kisses trail up his chest to it. Her tongue teased it, licking and kissing it until the beat of it was pounding through her lips and echoing throughout her body. She had to taste him. Her lips closed over the spot and she began to suckle his neck. Small white teeth closed over his skin and bit down... hard enough to mark him as hers... soft enough to incite a groan of pleasure/pain from him. She moved away from the spot to see her handiwork. When she lifted her lips there was a soft popping sound and Mulder jerked as if he had been punched. She smiled as she inspected the darkening bruise on his neck, pleased with herself. She nuzzled her nose and lips over it to soothe the bruise, then snuggled into the spot, allowing her gaze to fall down his body. She smiled again. Mulder was lying on his back, arms down at his sides. His hands were fisted, knuckles white. Her heart swelled at the thought that her touch excited him so much he had to make a Herculean effort not to pounce on her. He was giving her the time and space she needed. Mulder was allowing her to make the call on how far this would go. She had no doubt that he wanted her. The hard ridge of his erection was tenting the fabric of his pajama bottoms. She reached down and lifted his arm next to her, ducking under it and snuggling back into his embrace. "Scully, I love you," Mulder murmured into her hair. He rolled slightly towards her but stopped when his erection brushed her belly. "Don't mind him, he follows you everywhere but he's harmless," he tried to joke. "I certainly hope not," Scully teased. "I have big plans for him and I want him to be at the top of his game." Mulder was silent for a moment then rose up on his elbow, curling over her to stare deeply into her eyes. "I want you to know that it will never be a game to me, Scully. I love you and I want to make love to you. I'll never consider intimacy between us a game. This is who I am, Fox Mulder, crazy in love with a woman who is everything to him. You are the most beautiful, intelligent, loving person I have ever known. I wanted you when we first met, I was challenged and intrigued by the sexy little redheaded sent to spy on me. But I learned to trust you and have grown to love and cherish you. I'm totally blown away that you love me too." Dana Scully smiled up into his earnest gaze, "I do love you, Mulder." She gently rubbed her cheek against his hand that had risen to cup it. "I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you." "Then marry me, Scully," Mulder looked as surprised as Scully at his words. "Where did that c..come from, Mulder?" Scully stammered. "I don't know, I wasn't planning to say it," Mulder said. "But, I mean it. I want to marry you." "Why? I mean, why now?" Scully was floored. Mulder's response was slow in coming and Scully's heart was sinking before he spoke again. "I want to marry you Scully, but I know it's not the best thing for you. I mean, being partners with 'Spooky Mulder' is one thing, but being married to me would be the last nail in the coffin for your career." Scully frowned and started to scold him, but he stopped her with his next statement. "I guess it just popped out because I've thought about it so much. I'm tired of other men checking you out and when they don't see a ring on your finger, coming on to you." He shrugged and gave her one of his guilty-little-boy grins. "I want you to be mine and I want the world to know you want me to be yours. Do you understand? Is that selfish and insecure of me, Scully? " Scully's frown turned to a sweet smile, " I do understand and I don't think it's selfish or insecure to want to define our relationship. I've given marriage to you a thought or two in my fantasies, but I wasn't sure how you felt about it." She pushed him back down on his back and snuggled into his embrace. "A fantasy about us being married? Do tell, Scully," Mulder was intrigued. "Was it about a big white wedding? Our honeymoon?" he guessed as she laughed and shook her head. "Come on, partner, give. I want to know what you fantasized about me and marriage." Scully groaned and said, "When will I learn to keep my mouth shut?" But the laughter that bubbled up in her took the sting from her words. "Scully... Was it about sex?" "Well, if you must know, usually it was very tame. Not sex, but love." Mulder drew her closer to his side and kissed the top of her head, but remained silent. "Usually I would think about it right after we had a run in with one of those women." "What women?" Mulder tried to follow her line of thought. "One of those women that wanted to throw you down and screw your brains out, Agent Mulder," Scully said. "Scully? Where did we meet these women?" Mulder was still in the dark. "Does the names Phoebe, Angela White, Diana Fowley or Julie Mills mean anything to you, Mulder?" Scully teased with a little more heat. "Scully, I didn't have... anything to do with any of those women..." Mulder protested. "I know, but it wasn't just them, Mulder. It's the police women when we're out on a case, witnesses, hell, even the perps, all the women we meet." "Scully, I've never..." "Mulder, you're not dead. You've looked back. I guess what hurt me was that I had no right to be upset. We didn't have a verbal understanding of any kind and I felt foolish to be so jealous. That's why I would fantasize." Mulder had to strain to hear her next words, "I would think about what had happened that upset me and try to fantasize what would have happened if you were... we were..." "If we were married?" Mulder supplied. "Well, yes. Or if we were committed to one another," Scully continued. "It was silly really, probably nothing like reality." Mulder smiled and pressed an affectionate kiss to her temple. "That's why they call it a fantasy." When she didn't respond, he said, "Tell me. Please." "Sometimes... Mulder, this is embarrassing," Scully stammered. "Would it help if I tell you a favorite fantasy of mine first?" When she didn't respond, he continued, "It's nothing embarrassing, honest." She nodded against his shoulder, "Yes." He was quiet for a moment then continued, "When we travel, we both get tired and ready to be home, but when we arrive at the airport we usually go our separate ways. Sometimes, especially when I first walk into my empty apartment, I think about what it would be like if we went home together." His voice faded with his final words. "How?" Scully whispered. "How do you think it would be?" She could feel him squirm a little in discomfort, but wasn't ready to let him off the hook now that they had begun to talk. "Mulder?" "It started when I came back from San Diego, after Emily." He squeezed her when she gasped in surprise. "I walked in, and for the first time I recognized why it felt so cold, empty. I wanted to be with you, Scully. As I ate and unpacked and got some laundry together, I realized how alone and incomplete I felt without you." "Later, when I was trying to get to sleep, I started thinking about how things would be different if... if, you know, it was we in stead of me coming in that door from a case." He let his fingers play with her hair as he spoke, but didn't continue. "And?" Scully encouraged him. "And... I thought about the drive home and how we would get out of the car together and pull our bags from the trunk. You would let me help you with the majority of the bags while you went ahead and opened the door." Mulder stopped and peeked down at her. She had her eyes closed, but a small smile hovered on her lips. "It's funny, I didn't picture my place, but it wasn't yours either. It was kind of a combination of our places. I would take all the bags into the bedroom and put them at the foot of the bed while you were in the kitchen getting us something to drink or eat, that usually was determined by how hungry or thirsty I was when I was thinking about us," he grinned. "Then what?" she said. "Well, we would sit on the couch and discuss the case for a few minutes before we did anything else, but not for long. Then you would go into the bedroom and start unpacking and I would check our e-mail or the answering machine and then go on in to help you unpack and do the laundry." "Mulder, that sounds just like what most couples do when they return home from a vacation." "Yeah, normal, huh? But that's not why it was such a good fantasy," he whispered. "What made it special, Mulder?" "Each time I would think about it, I always ended it the same way," his voice caught and she could tell that this was the most important part. "We would be doing laundry and I would bring you a drink of water. You were sitting up on the washer, reading the case file while you waited for it to finish. You would have your glasses on and they would be slipping down your nose when you looked up to thank me." He fell quiet again, but she decided to let him finish at his own speed. "I... um... I would make some inane joke and you would looked at me, you would give me one of your million dollar smiles, you know the ones that light up your eyes and make your whole face radiant. I would feel so loved, Scully, so whole." "Mulder..." "And you would take off your glasses and put down the file and say something sexy like, 'C'mere, Baby.' and I would walk into your arms and we would hug for a long time and maybe kiss. But I wouldn't feel empty or alone or worried about you. I would have you in my arms in an embrace that would protect us both. And then I could sleep for a while," Mulder finished. Scully tightened her arms around him and kissed his neck. "That was a good one, Mulder. I'm afraid it makes my fantasy sound pretty dull." He squeezed her back. "What would trigger your fantasies, Scully?" "Like I said, it was usually after a run in with another woman. I would go back over what had been said and wonder how it would be different if we were together." "Like what?" he wasn't going to let her be this general, he needed details. Scully thought for a while and finally began to speak. "Do you remember that case in Norfolk, the one with the poltergeist?" "The poltergeist that turned out to be a jealous boyfriend of the daughter spying on the family?" he nodded. "Yes, that's the one. Do you remember the waitress at the diner by the motel, the one that practically grabbed your head and shoved your face into her cleavage?" Mulder chuckled, "It wasn't quite that blatant, Scully." "You couldn't see her back in the kitchen, unbuttoning more buttons before bringing us our meal, but I could. I wondered later that night what she would have done if I hadn't been there. Would you have accepted her offer, Mulder? Was I keeping you from having a sex life?" "Scully!..." Mulder sputtered. "No, Mulder, it's not a question, it was just a thought that hounded me at the time. It kept me awake for so long that I began to think of other possible scenarios. If you and I were dating, or if we were engaged, or if we were married..." she fell silent again. "And if we were married, what would you have done when she came on to me, Scully?" Mulder had to ask. "If we were married and she came on to you that strongly I would like to think that you would ignore her beyond common courtesy," Scully said. "What? No dreams of snatching her baldheaded or a catfight to protect my manhood?" Mulder teased. "No, but I did have to stifle the urge to toss your glass of orange juice in her face the next morning when we stopped on our way home," Scully giggled. "So we've both thought about being married to one another," Mulder started the conversation again. "Yes," Scully agreed. "Well, what do you say about making it a reality, instead of a fantasy? Marry me, Scully?" "Mulder, we've never even really kissed before today. We've not had... a... urmm.... relations. How can you possibly want to marry me without knowing if we are compatible?" "Come on, Scully! How much more intimate could a relationship be than ours? We wanted to have a baby together. We've seen each other in every conceivable situation except in a sexual relationship. Tell me that you don't feel you know me. Tell me that you don't love me, but don't tell me we don't know that we are compatible." Scully was quiet for a moment but then nodded, "You're right, Mulder. We have known each other long enough and gone through enough to know that we will be great together. Yes, I'll marry you Mulder. I love you." "Really? Scully, you will?" Mulder didn't seem to be able to believe his own ears. "Yes, Mulder. Isn't it customary to kiss the future bride after a proposal?" Scully teased. "Scully," Mulder placed his hand on her cheek and smiled down at her. "I love you." He used the arm wrapped around her to slightly move her up so that their faces were closer together. He kissed her tenderly, careful not to overwhelm her with his passion. Scully kissed him back meeting his lips with a hunger that surprised him. Their kisses continued for a long while, first soft and gentle, then wild and passionate, moving back to tender and loving. "Mulder, we better get some sleep, we have to be up in a few hours to catch our flight home." "We could catch a later flight," Mulder kissed her again. "Mulder, the rest of the team will be on that flight. We have to be, too," Scully was unhappy with being forced to be the voice of reason, but she knew it had to be her if it was going to be anyone at all. "Okay, Scully," Mulder finally sighed and said. "But please don't make me go back to my lonely bed." "Just try to make a move, Mulder," Scully growled as she snuggled into his arms. Mulder yawned and said, "I don't know if I can get to sleep, Scully, I'm jazzed." Scully smiled against his chest. She knew he wasn't just speaking of her acceptance of his proposal. He was still partially erect, but she could feel his body relaxing against her. "Night Mulder. We've got a lot to take care of when we get back home." "Yeah," he yawned again. "Wedding rings to buy..." "And reports to complete," she sighed back. "You have to tell your mother..." "You have to tell the guys..." "Maybe we shouldn't say anything about my little stroll up the lane today to your mom or the guys... Okay, Scully?" Mulder looked down at her. "Scully?" She was sleeping snuggled in his arms. Mulder smiled and drew her even closer. He closed his eyes and thought about their home coming tomorrow. They slept. XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX Epilogue: Georgetown, VA May 26, 2000 11:47 PM XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX Mulder pulled their bags out of the trunk of the cab as Scully paid the driver and waited for a receipt. They had been in New York City, attending the annual FBI Recognition Banquet and Dinner Dance at the Waldorf Astoria. Normally both Mulder and Scully hated this type of function and made it a policy not to attend. But this year they had not been given a choice. Mulder had received a medal and commendation for the capture of Neeks and the subsequent bloodless resolution of the standoff with The Green and The Grey cult. Their attendance at the awards ceremony was mandatory, but they had managed to beg off for the actual banquet and dinner dance, even though it meant giving up a free stay at the Waldorf Astoria. Scully's brother Charlie and his family were in town for the Memorial Day weekend. According to Maggie Scully, her attendance at the homecoming barbecue was not only mandatory but superseded the demands of the FBI. A.D. Skinner decided he was more than happy to let Mulder leave early with her. The last thing he wanted was an unleashed Mulder confined in a New York ballroom with the likes of the Director of the FBI, senators, congressmen and various DOD and DOJ higher-ups. Mulder and Scully had rushed to make the final red-eye flight from New York to DC after the awards. They were exhausted. Mulder headed directly to the closet to hang up his tuxedo and her gown before hitting the shower. He reeked of perfume and rum and coke, thanks to the very drunk, very aggressive woman in the seat next to his on the plane. They had been out of town for four of the last five days and both were looking forward to sleeping in their bed. Scully disappeared into the kitchen, presumably for a snack. She teased him constantly about her increased appetite. She was burning off so many more calories now that they had sex whenever they felt like it that she was constantly hungry. Mulder smiled as he thought of all the good things that had happened in the last month. He and Scully told her Mom about the new development in their relationship. Maggie had surprised them and burst into hysterical tears. It was a long few minutes until she was able to tell them that it was tears of happiness coursing down her face. They had been shopping one day and had playfully picked out rings together. Mulder had gone back and purchased the set and presented her with the engagement ring just last week. She wore her ring when they were off work. They decided there was no need to rush into a public announcement. He had sublet his apartment to a rookie agent and moved in with her two weekends ago. They were looking for a new place that would be theirs. They had asked the guys to help them move his stuff into storage, so they had had to tell them about the engagement. Frohike was still wearing black. He had actually received a medal and commendation for the solution to the San Antonio case from the FBI. Chief Sanders had sent him a commendation from the Mayor of San Antonio. Along with the award was a wedding invitation from Julie Mills and Trey Sanders. He shook his head in wonder. But not everything was sweetness and light. Both he and Scully still had moments of sorrow over the loss of their last chance to have a baby. There had to be another way for her to conceive. If all it took was having sex, they would have created an entire football team of offspring by now in just the three short weeks they had been intimate. Thinking of Scully and sex reminded Mulder. Where was she? He had expected her to join him in the shower after her snack. He dried off and wrapped a towel around his hips. He shaved quickly before leaving the bathroom. He hated to see his stubble burns mar her beautiful skin. It was so soft and creamy and he loathed the idea that he had hurt her. "Scully? Where are you?" Mulder called as he left the bathroom and headed toward the kitchen. "What are you doing? Eating dinner?" he teased as he entered the empty kitchen. He heard the washer start and headed toward the hall between the kitchen and bedroom where the washer and dryer were housed. "In here, Mulder," Scully's voice confirmed. Mulder turned off the lights as he went, anticipating crawling in bed with Scully, but he came to a sudden halt when he turned the corner into the hallway. The only sounds to be heard were those of the washer and Mulder's sharp intake of breath when he saw Scully. He closed his eyes and exhaled deeply. He managed a breathless "Scully," before words failed him again. Dana Scully sat on top of the washer wearing her glasses, his medal, and a black thong. She had lit several candles in the bedroom and the soft glow made her skin shine with the luminescence of pearls. Next to her was a champagne bucket with a chilling bottle of Dom Perignon and two champagne flutes. Mulder stepped into her arms and kissed her passionately. She had done this for him. She was giving him his fantasy and even more. He felt her hands slide down his arms and her fingers intertwine with his. He pulled back suddenly when he realized that the ring he had given her was on her finger, third finger, left hand. She hadn't been wearing it earlier tonight. "Mulder did you read the inscription on your medal?" Scully purred. "Sure, 'For Bravery Above and Beyond The Call of Duty'. That's what they all say, isn't it?" Mulder kissed her neck. "But did you read the back?" Scully persisted. "No, what's it say?" He nibbled his way up her neck, alternating soft kisses with little sucking bites. "It says, 'For Exposing the Bare Truth in BeXar County'. Do you think they knew just how close to the truth they came?" she teased. Mulder grinned back at her as he removed her glasses and lifted her into his arms to take her to bed. Scully wrapped her arms and legs around him as he held her. She reached down and pulled the towel from his hips, wiggling to lower her wet heat onto his erection. As his cock slid into her she whispered into his ear, "Welcome home, lover."